11w6d

so today I'm 11w6d and I'm off for my scan tomorrow. Am sooooo nervous now it's not funny. I'm crossing everything that things will be ok and tomorrow morning I will see a nie active little bubba and a good strong heartbeat. It's the NT scan tomorrow and hope and pray everything is hunky dory.... In hindsight now I wonder if I shouldn't have done all this but I'm sure all will be ok anyway! Without trying to be too overly confident!!!! Such a fine line to walk!!!

Am very, very tired today and my eyes are burning from crying so much last night. DP and I had our 2nd rather large blue last night and it was just awful. He ended up taking off in the car for 2 hours and I was very worried. When he came back he was still angry and in a dreadful mood and our arguing jsut seemed to go around and around in circles. In the end something came up about work and he just seemed to hit a brick wall and got very upset. Nearly more upset than I've ever seen him. He then jsut seemed to spill everything about what is happening in his business, his staff, his customers and the unrealistic expectations they have on him, and the fact that his business partner has been off work for the past 3 months with a broken hip and he's had to carry the burden of so much stuff on his own. It's obviously not his business partner's fault in any way, shape or form, but I think we have all underestimated how much it has gotten to my DP. Even I didn't really see it, as like most blokes, he just bottles it all up and then blows his top when it all gets too much. In the end, he seemed almost relieved to be able to talk about it all and I reassured him that we would work on a plan to tackle each issue, one at a time. I'm a business manager in my current role, so have a little bit of an idea about business improvement practices etc so will do my best to support him and his business as best I can!
The good thing is that things are out in the open now and I hope DP feels more at ease discussing this now and not bottling it all up so much! We're in this together!!

Am having a very tough day at work too. Am sooooo looking forward to 5pm! It's now 2:15pm and haven't had a lunch break yet, so hope to head out shortly for a breath of fresh air and get away from my desk! Probably shouldn't be wasting time writing in this blog, but had to debrief somewhere! Also wanted to send a big thankyou to my FB/BH friends for your hugs and love last night when I was feeling rotten! Big hugs back to you all!!!

So, will update blog tomorrow as soon as I can with how the scan etc goes - can't wait to see DP's reaction when he sees it on the screen!!